my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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