You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize
