And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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