I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
