i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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