I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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