Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
