But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
honey bunches of taint.
ugly people sure do ruin things
and she was petting her beer can
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
