Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
