Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
