The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
