dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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