Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
