I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize