I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
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