hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I just googled if crying burns calories
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Randomize
