if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
