In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Randomize
