Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Randomize
