I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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