i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
well you can't waste a boner
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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