Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
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