Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
