Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
