Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I'm passing your future prison.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize