Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize
