So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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