I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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