: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
