i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
