I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
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