There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
It's just like the Real World with babies
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize