Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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