i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
