the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Randomize
