I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
