We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
