Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
