In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
