You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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