i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
