She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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