Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize