Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
