call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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