I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Randomize
