and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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