I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
