is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
