I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
