Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
