She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
